Entering and Exiting Conversations…Gracefully

Although entering a room is uncomfortable, nothing is more daunting than entering a room full of people… already in groups. They say that ‘breaking up is hard to do’ but “breaking in” is more difficult. Being able to do so enhances our business and careers. How we gracefully join a work in progress concerns many people who find it awkward. To make it easier, here are strategies for breaking and entering and exiting.

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Breaking In

There are several ways to do that. One way is the lesson learned from shy people: arrive within fifteen minutes of the appointed hour. That way the room is not full of already formed groups. When we do see many groups in any room, find the group with three or more people who look and sound like they are having a good time. Stand in the periphery and when acknowledged step in and respond. BONUS TIP: When you see someone in your group’s periphery, step back. In doing so, you will have included the excluded and that is memorable.

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Gracious Exits

Parting is such sweet sorrow but we must exit and move on.

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Exit One

After an interesting conversation, interrupt yourself, indicate the conversation was pleasant, interesting, and informative and offer a phrase or sentence that summarizes the conversation. Offering a hand for a handshake, signals “the end”. One colleague smiles and says, “I could monopolize your time but you must want to meet others.” It works for her.

Ask for a card if appropriate and offer one of yours. Then walk a quarter of the room over to another individual or group so your conversation partner won’t think you just turned your back.

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Exit Two

After a conversation that is belabored, still be polite because doing otherwise could cause a problem down the road. Offer your hand for the handshake and in a most upbeat voice, “I hope you enjoy the rest of the meeting, party, game, and conference.” And still walk a quarter of the room away from the person. Chance is an interesting game because we never know who will reappear in the rooms of our life and be the key contact.

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Exit Three

Another way to exit is a ‘bring-along”. Instead of excusing yourself, offer to introduce your new contact to others. An introduction spoken with respect, interest and energy is infectious.

Helping others increase their contact base is kind, smart and memorable! It’s a way to develop your business, your reputation and your bottom-line.

Whether it’s a conference, a meeting or an event, Susan RoAne helps people increase their communication, interactions, comfort and confidence in every room.

Eight Great Strategies for Working Any Room

Walking into a room full of people, especially strangers, is daunting for 93% of American adults. Yet, our careers, businesses and social lives are enhanced by our ability to meet, mingle, interact and make connections. For over 18 years, How To Work A Room® has been a resource for professionals across the country. If we adjust our mindset to that of making others comfortable with us, our interacting, socializing and conversing is easier.

Read Name Tags. As you extend your hand and introduce yourself, use the person’s name. Name tags provide material for conversation about that person. Wear yours on the right hand side. It’s the line of sight with an extended handshake. Ask a question about the company, location, her position, etc. (This can be difficult for those of us who don’t wear our glasses and end up with our faces on the person’s name tag. Should that happen, a conversation will definitely follow!

Reintroduce Yourself to People. They will generally respond in kind. Then no one has to struggle with forgotten names.

Look for the White-Knuckled Drinker. Whether it’s club soda or wine, the shy, uncomfortable person has the glass gripped so tightly for support that the knuckles turn white. That person, who is speaking to noone, would welcome your conversations.

Attend Events with a “Buddy.” Choose someone in a non-competitive field and cross-promote each other.

Warning: Be sure to choose a companion who will introduce you with the same level of enthusiasm that you have demonstrated.

Extricate and Circulate. According to Miss Manners, one must learn to end conversations. Extricating oneself from a conversation is a must. “Well it was great to talk to you about….” Summarize the main thrust of your chat . . . and move about one quarter of the room away. No sense in standing in the same area near the person you just left. Find another solo or. . . join a group. Stand on the periphery of the group and when acknowledged, step in.

Allow for Serendipity. It is the unexpected bonus that happens to you because of good timing. Because . . . “Ya Never Know!” which is my theory of marketing, meeting and mingling.

Have Fun! People are attracted to others who are enjoying themselves. A sense of humor will help you manage and survive myriad situations because laughter is a great medicine.

BONUS Tip: Leave your tools and toys of technology out of sight or in the off or vibrate position. The message you give when you “work” a room with your Bluetooth attached to your ear is that no one you are talking to is as important as whoever may be calling you. That leaves an impression but not the one you may want to make.

Be a Savvy Networker.

Acknowledge people who have given you time, leads, advice. Keep them “in the loop.”

Matchmake people you know with job leads, contacts, prospects and referrals. It comes back.

Stay in touch with your network when you need nothing from it. That makes it easier to get in touch when we need help/advice/leads.

Follow Up with the people whose cards you collected. Devise a system to organize the follow-up process. Or all is lost. Use the RoAne “TAP” method. Be Timely, Appropriate, Persistent. If we “work” rooms and don’t follow up, we will not have netted a network to work!

From the newly revised bestseller, How To Work A Room® by author and keynote speaker, Susan RoAne now available in local and online bookstores. Susan also consults with individuals who want to improve their socializing and mingling skills. For more information, free articles and The Schmooze Quotient Quiz, visit www.susanroane.com